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Old 09-05-2011, 11:29 AM   #1
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Old 09-05-2011, 11:31 AM   #2
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2134447 2010年05月18日 10:57 阅读(loading...) 评论(0) 分类:个人日记

日本人最恨的5个笑话(中国人进,belstaff jacket,必顶)
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第二个医生说:"我最喜欢为会计做手术。当你打开他们的身体时,一切都是按
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 第三个医生说:"我最喜欢为电工做手术。当你找开他们的身体时,一切都是用
颜色做代号的。"
   第四个医生说: "我最喜欢为日本人做手术。"其他三个医生面面相觑,表示
怀
疑,其中一个问什么。第四个医生说因为他们没有心肝,没有脊骨,且屁股和头可以相交换。
小日本最痛恨的五个笑话 (2)
一个人给日本人商人打电话说:"我找太郎先生。" 接线员说:"对不起,他上周去
世了。"第二天,这个人又一次打电话,想跟太郎谈一谈。这次接线员有点厌烦,说
:"我一直在告诉您他上周去世了。您为什么还要打电话呢?"那个人说:"因为我
就是喜欢听这件事。"
小日本最痛恨的五个笑话 (3)
一个日本人在中国一家饭店里吃饭。当侍者端上一盘龙虾后,日本人问道:请问你
们怎样处理吃剩的虾壳?""当然是倒掉啦,"侍者道。"NO!NO!NO!"日本人摇摇
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处理吃剩的柠檬皮?""当然是倒掉啦,"侍者道。"NO!NO!NO!" 日本人摇摇头说
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结帐的时候,日本人一边嚼着口香糖,一边笑着问侍: "请问你们怎样处理吃剩
的口香糖?""当然是吐掉啦,"侍者道。 "NO!NO!NO!" 日本人摇摇头,得意的
说,"在我们日本,嚼过的口香糖就送进工厂里,做成套套,然后再卖到你们中国,belstaff outlet
"侍者不耐烦的问道:"那你知道在我们中国,如何处理用过的套套吗?""当然是扔
掉啦。"日本人道。侍者摇摇头说:"NO!NO!NO!在我们中国,用过的套套就 送
进工厂里,做成口香糖,然后再卖到你们日本。"
小日本最痛恨的五个笑话 (4)
通往芝加哥机场的公路上行驶着一辆出租车,belstaff uk,车上乘坐着一个日本游客。这时,一
辆出租车超了过去,日本人喊道: "瞧,丰田!日本制造!多快呀!"过了一会儿
,又一辆出租车超了过去。"看,belstaff jackets outlet,尼桑!是日本制造!太快啦!"又一辆出租车超了
过去。 "嗨!是三菱!日本制造!快极啦!"出租车司机是百分之百的美国人,看
见那么多日本车超过自己的美国车,加上那个日本人张狂的语言,不免有些恼火。
出租车驶入机场停车场,这时,又一辆出租车超了过去。 "是本田!日本制造!快
极啦!没治啦!"出租车司机停下车,没好气儿地指了指计价器,说道:"1500美金
。""这么近就要1500美金?!" "计价器!日本制造!快极啦!没治啦!"
小日本最痛恨的五个笑话 (5)
有一架飞机上面坐有一美国人一个德国人一个日本人和一个中国人,飞机飞到一半
突然没油了,机长宣布必须有一人跳机以减轻重量,于是那美国人就发挥其个人英
雄主义精神走到飞机舱口高呼一声:美利坚和众国万岁!!然后就跳下去了!飞机
继续飞.....这时机长又宣布:重量还是太重了,belstaff online,还的跳下去一个人!于是德国人
就站出来,走到飞机舱口,高呼一声:德意志帝国万岁!也跟着跳了下去!飞机继
续飞..... 这时机长又宣布说:不行,还是重了,必须再跳下去一个人!中国人看
了日本人一眼,站起来走到了飞机舱口,日本人赶紧走过来紧紧握住中国人的手:
好兄弟,我不会忘了你的!中国人高呼一声:中华人民共和国万岁!! 接着一脚把
日本人给踹下去了!!......

标签 日本人 笑话 中国人 最喜欢 小日本
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Old 09-05-2011, 11:31 AM   #3
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转载自 258096025 2010年03月15日 23:05 阅读(loading...) 评论(0) 分类:个人日记




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­
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­
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­
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  27.人非草木说:
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­
  28.张爱玲说:
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­
  ­
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Old 09-05-2011, 11:31 AM   #4
p8hghvbu
 
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面包车被撞翻 面包车司机王先生 供图

  今报开封讯 (记者 田霖/文)一辆面包车在乡间公路上行驶,突然被火车撞翻,滚进路边沟,幸无人员伤亡。原来,这是个铁路与公路的交 叉口,但此处无任何警示牌。对此,开封铁路部门称,地方政府修建公路时未征求他们的意见,所以不只是这条路 ,附近的多条道路均“不存在铁路道口”,他们无责。

  ●路上正走着 面包车突被火车撞进沟

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Old 09-05-2011, 11:31 AM   #5
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141751 2009 年 01 月 29 日 15:03 Reading (loading. ..) Comments (2) Category: Personal Diary
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Old 09-05-2011, 11:32 AM   #6
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Bus about 5 meters high swept down the slopes

(Reporter DU Hai) yesterday afternoon, then a bus in Chongqing Expressway West Wing at the toll station ramp, hit the guardrail and plunged to about 5 meter-high slope. Spontaneous crossing of private owners of the 11 injured passengers to Chen Bridge Hospital.
5 meters high rushed down the slopes

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Passengers told reporters that the passengers on board were injured, one seriously injured some students Manlianshixue.
City Highway law enforcement detachment deputy head of the top ten teams briefed reporters Wu Changchun, this car bus crashed after more than 10 meters barrier,mbt lami shoes, rushed down the slope of about 5 meters high, and finally cross roadside.
passing driver to take the wounded

after the accident, several students injured,mbt shoes outlet, a lighter Manlianshixue student rescued from the bus.
.
Ten team then rushed to the scene of law enforcement officers will be isolated,skechers shoes, leaving only one lane traffic. Until 15:50, crane bus away, the traffic returned to normal.
suspicion of wet weather on

at the scene of the accident,mbt sport shoes, the bus driver claimed the vehicle in motion the process that the brakes failed and he hit the left direction, and right fight direction, seeing the red car to the guardrail, then trying to pull back car was too late.
Wu Changchun, told reporters after the accident, the school where students and quickly set up their company bus incident management team, each wounded to the hospital for treatment. Site inspection from the current situation, in connection with the wet weather related accidents, does not rule out the possibility of speeding. They will bus to vehicle inspection.
highway to remind drivers to law enforcement friends, recently increased rainfall in case of surface water, need to be cautious driving, must not slam on the brakes.
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Old 09-05-2011, 11:32 AM   #7
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Reprinted from 250006991 at 15:41 on June 9th 2010 Read (loading. ..) Comments (1) Category: Miscellaneous world Kan
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Old 09-05-2011, 11:32 AM   #8
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Old 09-05-2011, 11:32 AM   #9
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,coach sunglasses

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Reprinted from 57143492 at 00:22 on August 13, 2010 Reading (loading. ..) Comments (0) Category: Personal Diary
Almost all finance staff have been forced to do fraudulent accounting, the following took the way I will do roughly summarized as follows false accounting, audit only if you work is a backup reference it, not to mention that I taught Oh, you are cooking the books:
1.
operating cost of each method: the cost of the project will fall into a spending account processing fee in order to achieve the purpose of current tax deduction, or items of expenditure are costs in order to control the cost of pre-tax net profit ratio and exaggerated the purpose of the current period. Reason: Because the cost of direct labor, direct materials, manufacturing cost components, and direct labor, manufacturing costs and marketing expenses, administrative costs and so easy to mix Rao, it is the operation of the vulnerability. The other direct materials and labor included in freight handling and management fees and other costs are also relatively easy to integrate.
2. cost of capital (capacity) each of
How: The cost of the project are changed accounting treatment of assets, deferred tax deductions from depreciation. Asset classes or subjects belonging to confirm the cost of direct expenses, profit before tax.
Reason: part of the asset itself, including fees, other costs it can be integrated into the asset value, and vice versa. The other assets of repair, such as their borrowing costs easier to confirm the boundaries of artificial virtual. The other fixed assets and intangible assets more easily recognized based on the virtual.
3. costs of nominal conversion
how: some of the tax deduction limit the cost of a ratio of the excess into a more relaxed or other restrictions limit the cost of items not accounted for in order to achieve full tax deduction reduce the relevant tax purposes or other purposes. Cause: The costs that are based on the invoice, the invoice is easy virtual.
4. costs accrued / deferred / selective sharing
How: To control the size of current profit before tax, accrued expenses, to defer the tax. Or for other purposes (such as the equity transfer price, current performance) exaggerate the current selection is deferred profit.
another cost-sharing will be selective, such as expense items in the scale of the regulation, control, taxes and fees caused by the project (such as the regulation of land value-added tax). Reason: with the first 3 points.
5. the cost of items into
How: will belong to the current cost of the project can be carried forward into the cost of other projects can not be carried forward, or anti-bound.
6. the cost is recognized in advance & delay / selective sharing
How: The cost of current period carried forward more or less carry-over period, next filled, or choose to achieve the above cost allocation method two purposes. Reasons: the cost of carry-over provisions of a more vague.
7. revenue recognized in advance & delay / selective sharing
methods of operation: the current period income more or less carried forward carried forward,coach women shoes, next filled. Or select the income allocation method to achieve the above two purposes. Reason: the more obscure provisions of revenue recognition.
8. transforming
How nominal income: the total income to be adjusted between a variety of income items,coach shoes, such as the main income into other business income or business income, in order to control the turnover tax, or highlight the main business performance objectives.
9. liabilities of income / expenditure balance of
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10. income, costs, expenses, inflated / minus
How-to: reduce income artificially inflated or false or costs or expenses, or virtual cut income. Basis for the adjustment caused the error. To tax or other purposes of delay.
11.
How Transfer Pricing: The price of external counterparties to deal with people to achieve the purpose of transfer pricing, the price decrease or increase the cost of other ways to conduct their own coffers to make up for each other. To achieve the purpose of tax avoidance.
12. assets, liabilities names into
methods of operation: the asset classes of fixed assets in the names change, to change its depreciation life; the receivables pegged to other receivables, or linked to other accounts payable in advance and other tax avoidance techniques.
13. false
How Exchange Act: The contract does not exist in the transaction are recorded,coach sneakers, leading to capital outflows and increase current expenses, to reduce income tax purposes.
14.
income approach, leading to operating cost method: Taxes in income due to the revenue recognition prior to the direct costs of offset each other to achieve the controlled flow of tax items. If follow-up period of the business into a lower discount price.
15.
How recombinant transfer method: the use of stock transfer, asset sale and debt restructuring to achieve the transfer of funds or income tax purposes. If the company transfers of funds, to bilk other bankruptcy purposes.
16. private costs of
How the company: the cost of the private into the company's costs,地震, that is to reduce personal income tax payable is the purpose of a tax added to the cost of corporate income tax purposes before the deduction. Such as: personal vehicle fuel costs in the company handling personal rent fee for processing.
17. revenue / cost / expense
How transfer method: separation of the contract, the income or costs,2010年经典语句, or expenses transferred to other companies or individuals, to differences in tax treatment purposes. Or to fill the company's costs reimbursed, coffers compensation is limited to the cost of their balance.
18. inflated / decrease the circulation of
OPERATION: to work on during the transfer process, more a transfer process, the amount of income of more than one, each ratio limits the scope of the cost of the deductible increases. Or a virtual out part of the cost of assets such as loans to individuals bought by the company, the company leased personal property, intangible increase in rental costs. Or other means of payment by commission income.
19. the use of financial instruments law
How: Using the stock, futures, foreign exchange and other financial instruments is difficult to control the future price of the transaction. The transaction price at a low level, after trading a financial instrument investment income, to avoid some of the turnover tax.
20.
How-operation group: the use of group operations to achieve national reunification of the approved part of the group's mode of operation tax purposes. Will cost the company within the Group balanced distribution, to co-ordinate tax purposes. If the group set up software companies, salary deduction without limit 1600, the staffing of other companies in the company, wage in the company's hair,coach outlet, people in the other company. And so forth.
21. Other
such as: if the borrower becomes the deposit received from other processing companies. Taxes generated by the interest to avoid out. And so forth.
Note: do financial friends, ah, false accounting to learn Oh, Oh, but they have to dig deep.
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Old 09-05-2011, 11:33 AM   #10
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