This is the truth. The only question is how? What may be the
likeliest means? I have sometimes thought of going to London
again after Easterand sometimes resolved on doing nothing till
she returns to Mansfield. Even nowshe speaks with pleasure of
being in Mansfield in June; but June is at a great distanceand I
believe I shall write to her. I have nearly determined on explaining
myself by letter. To be at an early certainty is a material object. My
present state is miserably irksome. Considering everythingI think
a letter will be decidedly the best method of explanation. I shall be
able to write much that I could not sayand shall be giving her
time for reflection before she resolves on her answerand I am less
afraid of the result of reflection than of an immediate hasty
impulse; I think I am. My greatest danger would lie in her
consulting Mrs. Fraserand I at a distance unable to help my own
cause. A letter exposes to all the evil of consultationand where
the mind is any thing short of perfect decisionan adviser mayin
an unlucky momentlead it to do what it may afterwards regret. I
must think this matter over a little. This long letterfull of my own
concerns alonewill be enough to tire even the friendship of a
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