Tiffany Key Necklace to &quot

Features with the Foreskin, Purposes in the Prepuce
bumber sticker offered from the Intactivism Shop
Joseph
explained...
Over and above the appropriateness of the way the circumcision question is asked by doctors, isn't it inappropriate to be asking anything at all?
IS the foreskin some sort of birth defect or congenital deformity with which every baby boy is born with?
Without any medical situation commanding any kind of surgical intervention whatsoever, how is it that medical doctors are even performing circumcisions, let alone have the audacity to ask parents to let them perform ANYTHING?
It's actually kind of sad for me to read an article pleading, begging that parents become more informed on a surgical procedure, because whether or not it will be performed, medical necessity be damned, will be determined solely by them.
This searching and becoming informed. This poring through books, studies and websites to become "better informed" on a medical matter.
Is that not the doctor's job?
Doctors went to school for 12 or so years. They hang their hard-earned piece of paper in a plaque on their wall and demand they be called "doctor." Yet, in a flash, they're suddenly stupid when it comes to circumcision, and suddenly it's the parent's job to "consider the pros and cons."
What precisely are medical doctors being paid for then, if parents have to do all the work?
What other surgical procedure are medical professionals simply too dumb to understand that they must ask parents to "help them out?"
They say that it's hard to get a person to understand something when his salary depends on not understanding.
BOTTOM LINE: Doctors should know better than to let naive parents do their job for them, and they should know better than to ask parents to let them perform medically unnecessary surgical procedure with dubious "medical benefits."
The fact that there has to be articles like me makes me very sad.
January 27, 2010 10:57 AM Team Harris
said...
I'd love to write a piece and share with you (from your perspective of neonatal nurse and parent) why I chose to leave my sons intact. If you are interested, let me know how I might share my thoughts.
mikeandchristina AT gmail DOT com
January 27, 2010 12:30 PM Elena Margo Gould
said...
That's a good point, Joseph, why would the problem of unnecessary surgery ever be brought up by a health care professional for new parents? Ideally, shouldn't it be the parents, acting on uninformed assumptions and outdated traditions, who bring up the idea of circumcision, to which the health care professionals, sworn to do no harm, would respond, "You want to do WHAT to your healthy baby???"
Maybe someday...
January 27, 2010 1:44 PM Erin
explained...
Wow - So many resources are listed here! I found that I was quite ignorant during pregnancy about circumcisions until I spoke more in-depth to others and, ultimately, watched a horrific video. We are creatures of habit and so many of us go through life doing what we've seen or accepted without problem. What we need on this issue is more education. Thank you for your contribution.
January 27, 2010 6:36 PM dunnpenquite
said...
I have a blog about natural birthing and related topics. I included the story of why I circ'ed my first son and didn't my second. Please feel free to link to it if people want to hear about from the perspective of a mother who changed her mind once she knew the facts.
curllyq.wordpress.com
January 27, 2010 8:19 PM curllyq
mentioned...
I have a blog about natural birth and related topics. I wrote about why I circ'ed my first son and left my second intact. Please feel free to link to it so people can read about it from your perspective of a mother who changed her mind after she did the research.
January 27, 2010 8:21 PM Andrea
mentioned...
with our first, we were never told that a nicked artery and hemorrhaging was a possible complication. and when it happened and my 10 day old was in the hospital, i couldn't stop thinking, why did no one tell us? the reason behind the decision in the first place was pressure from my mother and i didn't want to do it.
our second son is intact and i see my oldest's scar everyday and i will feel guilt for it always.
January 27, 2010 8:34 PM Catherine
explained...
great list of sites and info, can't wait to do some more reading. Nobody ever even asked me (aside from my exhusband) if we wanted to circ. I assumed at the time that nobody had it done anymore, and I know here in Canada our rates are quite low, but really, from what I hear and read, sounds like some parents get a lot of pressure to do it and it's so bloody weird to me.
January 27, 2010 8:34 PM Jose Rodriguez
stated...
Andrea is a clear example of how physicians trick mothers and do not give enough information, circumcision is a painful and unnecessary mutilation and especially that prevents cancer is false.
So we struggle to deceive not mothers, unfortunately Few of us We strive to give information, and most are women who are fighting for innocent babies.
For as the medical men were discharged circunsidados that pain with babies and as they have no foreskin not accept that the other men have foreskin.
January 27, 2010 8:36 PM ellizabeth
explained...
what about vaccines? what is your viewpoint on this matter? i have been researching and really don't want to vaccinate, but then i'm terrified she will happen to come across someone with a preventable disease...
tormented...
January 27, 2010 9:36 PM Zenbuoyant
stated...
thank-you Joseph for saying exactly what I've been trying to say for years! Only you said it more articulate and eloquent than I.
January 28, 2010 2:02 AM Christine
explained...
Joseph your quote," What precisely are doctors being paid for then, if parents have to do all the work?" is a shared concern for many parents who choose to be informed. I completely agree with you, and I'm not sure if your problem is rhetorical, but I do have my 2 cents about this.
In a way, medical professionals are paid to tell us what the health organizations tell them to tell us. Also, physicians are running businesses. Essentially they can choose which research to believe, and they might have their own personal biases about different organizations and their impact on the medical world. If researchers comes out with a study that proves that circumcision is not necessary, yet it is up to the parents to decide, doctors can EASILY take advantage of actually knowing the research, but not telling the parents the whole truth. Physicians are humans, just like us. We make mistakes, we manipulate, we desire to be successful in life, etc etc. Although physicians are taught over and over again to not abuse their position and to stay on top of research, there are plenty of political and monetary reasons why they either don't or simply can't. And yeah, that is really really sad. This is why we do our own research and become "active participants" in our own health.
I still totally agree with you. Myself and the author from the post could both get into discussions about unnecessary and unauthorized procedures done during birth and to your baby in the name of what is "routine."
January 28, 2010 5:39 AM Joseph
explained...
ellizabeth mentioned...
what about vaccines? what is your viewpoint on this matter? i have been researching and really don't want to vaccinate, but then i'm terrified she will happen to come across someone with a preventable disease...
tormented...
Yeah, what about vaccines?
Vaccines work by affecting the immune system, creating antibodies that make one's body immune to microorganisms that cause disease.
Circumcision cannot even come close to working like a vaccine.
HOW are vaccines relevant?
Christine said...
...doctors can EASILY take advantage of actually knowing the research, but not telling the parents the whole truth.
In which case, it sounds like the abuse is twofold; helpless babies are being maimed and doctors are taking advantage of their position of power to dupe naive parents.
Doctors aren't stupid; they know the system and how its loopholes work. The information is out there. Physicians can no longer feign ignorance. It is clear that the onus of "the big decision" is placed on parents so as to make money at the expense with the rights of children, and then wash their hands of it, so if there's ever a law suit they can say "the parents made me do it."
Circumcised men shouldn't be the only angry people; parents have reason to hold physicians in contempt.
Infant circumcision has got to be the oldest medical hoax in this country's history. I can't wait for the day when it blows over and medical doctors who profitted from this lie are torn limb from limb by angry men and parents.
January 28, 2010 7:24 AM peach
said...
That ribbon is a pregnancy and infant loss ribbon. Just thought you should know.
February 08, 2010 1:22 PM Mike W
stated...
the ribbon design by NOHARMM ( seems fitting as this is an issue that impacts about 44% of all pregnancies in the U.S. (the pregnancy of a male child) and because many parents have lost their newborns due to the detrimental consequences of prepuce amputation -- either through death (most often due to hemorrhage, seizure, heart attack or stroke),Tiffany Key Necklace, or as a result of a baby being completely changed from post-traumatic stress 'disorder' (PTSD) after circumcision.
February 08, 2010 3:00 PM x
explained...
I am a mother of a girl.
She came to us in our home.
If she ever discovers she has a brother, he will too.
To date, she has had no medical intervention. She is perfectly and wonderfully healthy and her doctor is amazed at her intelligence and natural-ness.
Thank you for making all this accessible. The sorrow I feel for the grown men who have been cut is often even greater than the babies... as I have not yet given birth to a boy.
March 12, 2010 6:06 PM Pickle
stated...
i just read this and just found your blog. I would like to let you know that at my midwife clinic they handed me a brochure explaining why it wasn't necessary. Cool huh?
April 30, 2010 12:26 AM Anonymous
said...
I am sad about Edgar Schoen's site. It provides points of view that just aren't true that may leave my boys feeling like they aren't normal or good enough. This HAS to be counter balanced with real life opinion. Intact boys are healthy, normal and ######UALLY ATTRACTIVE! All of us need to be accepted and we are ALL at our most vulnerable when worrying about our attractiveness. Those of us need to say we have had much pleasure (or more in my case) when we have been with intact men. I LOVE intact men, please do not be self-conscious.
June 05, 2010 2:56 AM mystic_eye_cda
explained...
Woah only half the links are coming up as ones I've clicked on since I reinstalled the computer 6 months ago.
Bravo!
June 05, 2010 11:56 PM mystic_eye_cda
said...
@Joseph:
"This searching and becoming informed. This poring through books, studies and websites to become "better informed" on a medical matter.
Is that not the doctor's job?"
[...]
"What other surgical procedure are physicians simply too dumb to understand that they must ask parents to "help them out?"
Oh I wish that circumcision were the only think they were stupid about.
I wish it wasn't also true for repeat c-sections, and more to the point "primary c-sections"
I wish there weren't medical professionals who still preform "pelvimetry" to "see if the baby will fit". Or physicians doing c-sections because the woman is "short", "too young", or whatever. And I really wish they weren't doing them because its Friday afternoon and they want to spend their weekend at home.
I wish they weren't doing episiotomies, really, ever.
I wish they weren't doing hysterectomies instead of just removing the fibroid. They remove tumors from brains and hearts and I'm supposed to believe that a non-cancerous mass that you don't even have to worry about "getting it all" is too hard?
We "used to" take out tonsils and adenoids left and right. We used to remove the appendix any time we were "in there".
But you think this is just a woman and child issue, and I wish it were only that. I was told to have my toenail surgically removed and have a piece of metal put in to prevent it growing back. This was after ONE incident. I got a second opinion, still have my toe nail, and have never had another problem.
Men have their prostate removed when the cancer is so slow growing it would almost never cause harm.
And its also things like using antibiotics for ear infections, GBS, and other things despite the evidence they do harm. Years of prescribing antidepressants which cause suicides among teens. Meds that don't work, or worse may reduce the condition they are aimed at but increase other problems (ie statins, wanna die of a heart attack or liver failure?). Or influenza vaccines which are completely ineffective in children under two but given to them "to protect others".
Who knows what other surgeries make no sense and are based on no evidence. I certainly don't. I'm a SAHM former programmer. I try to keep as informed as I can be on the health issues that impact my family... without subscribing to medical journals. Without med school.
The sad thing is most people know more about how their car/oven works than their heart. Yes physicians should be waaay better at informed consent, being up to date, and evidence based practice. But consumers have to be aware too - Caveat emptor.
June 06, 2010 12:09 AM Anonymous
mentioned...
some of those are much less serious than others - a hysterectomy in a woman who's pre-menopausal is quite different than having tonsils or an appendix removed unnecessarily.
As someone who might not have spent her 20's actively seeking out dangerous situations if I'd been on anti-depressants in my teens, I have to disagree on that one entirely. I spent 15-25 in dire need of good anti-depressants, putting myself through hell which plagues me in nightmares to this day... so maybe put that in a different category... Maybe teens need to be on suicide watch when starting an anti-depressant,Tiffany Blue, but I wouldn't rule them out entirely.
formerly depressed
June 06, 2010 4:36 AM Tanya
stated...
I just want to say I am SO thankful for the info you have on your blog.
My "natural minded" (but young) family dr retracted my intact 6 yr olds foreskin at his well check a couple of weeks ago and told me that since his foreskin can retract that we should teach him to clean under it at bath time. Thankfully, it wasn't a forceful retraction--his foreskin has started to separate from your glans--but I kind of freaked out inside and then went home and spent a lot of time gathering articles online to share w/the dr. Most of them were from your site--and several were linked from your site. I am now in the process of correcting his misconceptions about phimosis.
Thanks so much for all you do. Your blog is wonderfully informative and important!! :-)
June 06, 2010 5:21 AM Carla
explained...
Thank you so much for all this information. Drmomma is the reason I became an advocate on my own blog:
October 15, 2010 1:11 AM Eric
explained...
I cried today when my brother, who is 6 years older than I, told me that I was the catalyst in his decision to NOT mutilate his newborn son who is now 3 weeks old. He was indecisive up until the doctor was ready to cut his penis. He talked to a nurse who told him the facts (which surprised me) and he decided that the decision was not his, but his sons. I have an intact 3 year old and I couldn't be prouder of my big brother.
He wasn't expecting such an emotional response from me when he told me. I was genuinely crying from happiness and pride.
December 06, 2010 3:40 AM Christy
said...
I will mention something here that has really disturbed me, as I feel the need to share with someone. I do some volunteer work with young children and often have to change diapers and take them to the bathroom. All the boys I've seen are circumcised, I'm very sorry to report. Mine are intact.
Anyway, recently I saw two different little boys who had almost no penis left at all!!!!!!! They are the same age as my youngest, two. My son's penis is probably about an inch long (when he's not "happy" that is!) I haven't measured, but am guessing. I'm also going to guess about these other boys. I only saw them for the short time it took to change their diapers. I bet one only had about a quarter inch left and the other little boy had even less. That boy seemed to have almost no penis at all. :( I couldn't believe it and felt so bad for these boys and horrified as well.
I actually dread diaper and potty duty with the boys as I hate to see circumcised boys. I always feel so bad for them and what they went through and what has been taken from them. I had not seen boys left with so little before, though. Since circumcision removes 1/3 to 3/4 with the penis, apparently I have now seen a couple of very unfortunate boys on the worse end of that spectrum. :(
December 06, 2010 6:28 PM Anonymous
explained...
The first thing I want to say is that I am not in any way going against what you're saying. I agree wholeheartedly that people need to make informed decisions. I am a person who will need to learn a LOT more before I can even consider calling myself informed.
There's just one thing though: it seems that what is being implied is that these boys, once older, feel upset/abandoned/mistreated and otherwise betrayed by their parents. My fiance was circumcised and he says growing up he has never felt that he was lacking anything. It was not a source of insecurity and he did not feel as if he had been wronged by his parents or anyone else.
Again, I'm not saying that I agree with circumcision, but it seems as though people who are against it automatically assume that it has an emotionally lasting effect when it doesn't necessarily. A physically lasting effect, obviously, but not always an emotional one. Don't get me wrong,I agree that it is definitely possible,Tiffany Engagement! Just it's not an inevitability is what I'm trying to say.
I am,Tiffany Ring, however, horrified that some of these poor boys lost most of their penis to circumcision! My fiance is definitely in no way lacking like that! I didn't even know it could be taken so far! That some physicians would do that sickens me :(
January 18, 2011 6:49 PM One Little Mummy
said...
@Anonymous
I understand what you're saying but I think your perspective on it is partly based on living in a society that accepts the circumcision of boys.
The most common form of female circumcision is the removal from the clitoral hood- the prepuce organ- the same as male circumcision. Wouldn't you expect a victim of female genital mutilation to grow up with those same feelings you mentioned? I think you would. Because our girls have the rights to their whole bodies, the thought of a girl experiencing otherwise is outside of horrifying. But male genital mutilation is routine in our culture and so we are desensitised to it. That's the truly sad thing about it- there are people everywhere crying out about how barbaric FGM all the while there are little boys having their genitals cut.
Your fiance is lacking something- he is lacking a foreskin. My own husband felt the same way, though, as a lot of men do. But that is a completely normal, emotional response to having one's genitals cut. It's a defense mechanism. Women in countries that practice FGM claim to feel the same way- they are happy this was done to them and they are not lacking anything. But as women with our whole bodies, we know better!
After more research, my husband has realised that he is indeed missing something. He isn't bitter about it and has no hard feelings toward his mother. But he is in the process of restoring. This was the article that prompted him:
February 02, 2011 5:02 PM KAS
explained...
Anon,
I speak as the mother of two young intact boys and a cut husband. My hubby thought a lot like your fiance does,Silver Tiffany Bracelet, and it's an unfortunate but legitimate train of thought for a man who has absolutely no idea what he has lost and was circumcised at a young age. It wasn't until he was into puberty and actually examined himself that he realizes that a couple of the "problems" that he figured were minor and were things that were completely coincidental were actually related to his being circumcised. The problems he has are more common than most would let on and while they are not detrimental to his physical being and do not severely impact our ###### life, they are still problems that we can only assume would not exist if he had been left intact - unfortunately, even in the progressive area he was born, boys almost 30 years ago when he was born were always cut at birth, the end. However, once I started researching circumcision and discussing with him the function and importance with the foreskin, he has begun to realize exactly what he might have lost. While he isn't actively seeking restoration, and while he feels no ill will toward his parents for taking his opportunity to choose for himself, he still understands the gravity of circumcision and the lifelong implications it leaves for the boys and, later, the men who are affected.
February 02, 2011 5:42 PM CA Rhoades
mentioned...
All I can say after watching this brief video is:
Whhhhhhhaaaaat theeeee BLEEP !!!? It makes me sooo angry. This is the EXACT kind of ignorance that is causing so much harm to these precious little baby boys.
Be sure not no miss the very last line: "It's gonna be a better future for him."
February 14,Tiffany Earring, 2011 10:32 AM Kirsty
explained...
i saw a little boy at swimming lessons this week who was circumcised (he also had two older brothers); and i'm someone has never seen a penis circumcised, it just looks terrible compared to my little boy. just didn't look right!! thank you for all that you do! you are doing a great job!!
February 18, 2011 9:04 PM TealRose
mentioned...
I am a 56 year old grandmother and a Brit. and an ex nurse. I was shocked when I found out years ago that in America little baby boys were being circumcised with almost no yay or nay in the parents and to be honest, it was 'the done thing' so no-one would think it was wrong!
I more surprised that it STILL goes on... In the UK it is virtually unheard of except in the case of Jewish parents. I can't imagine how such a generally 'useless' and nonsensical practise is allowed to go on. I would have thought that surgeries had to be seen to be NEEDED?
I am so glad so many parents are seeing the light, and are making sure that their sons are kept intact and as perfect as the day they were born.
After all ... as a woman, I wouldn't want my breast tissue removed at birth just because as a fully developed woman I might get a rash under them from time to time in the summer months !!
February 26, 2011 3:28 PM Anonymous
mentioned...
A few hours ago...when I was far less informed then I was now. I THOUGHT I was informed, and had a whole lot of reasons to defend my denial in that I really thought I was protecting my sons by having them circumsized.
My stomach is in knots and my heart physically hurts for what I thought was right, no matter how hard it was. I think of my first son, so sensitive as I know his personality to be now. He would have been terrified- and I wasn't even there. My second son with a later diagnosed blood clotting disease could have hemorrhaged. Truly I am lucky he is even still alive. Why? Because I thought I Was protecting them from a urinary tract infection and they could look like their father. I was afraid from the stories I had heard from family members who had to be cicumsized in later childhood. Now I know those too were most likely unnecessary.
The guilt I feel right now it almost unbearable.
I hope that my sons will know that every day of their lives I have done my best in the moment for them, but when I know better sadly I cannot go back and undo what I didn't once know. I hope they will forgive me.
Thank you for your site. I am grateful and my future intact sons are grateful.
Jenn
March 03, 2011 8:41 PM KJS
explained...
Another eye opening lit analysis
The Emotional and Behavioral Effects of Circumcision
March 24, 2011 2:20 AM Linda
mentioned...
I went out to eat with 3 friends the other night I haven't seen in years. Between us we have 11 boys! Not a single girl between us! So the topic of circumcision came up. Only one of us had circumcised her sons and I had to secretly smile at how horrified everyone else acted toward her. Statistics were tossed around, stories of strapping babies down were told. She was told to promise never to mutilate another son and after our talk she eagerly agreed!
April 19, 2011 2:42 PM Anonymous
explained...
Having been born in England back in 1957, myself, and my brother who was born earlier, were not circumcised, and after reading all the articles about circumcision I could find, am very glad that we were left with our natural parts intact.
This was printed in a Playboy Advisor a few years back, and I was not only angry, but outraged at this stupid, ignorant woman. Here is the letter:
"I am a mother of two sons. Although I consider myself to be holistic and a bit of a hippy holdover, I had my boys undergo circumcision. This is not to say that I didn't feel like an ogre as my sons were strapped down, but I felt the momentary pain they would experience was far less damaging then the pain they would feel by being rejected by their girlfriends because they were unsure or grossed out by their boyfriend having a foreskin, I wanted to make sure they looked like their Daddy."
Can you believe that ignorant fool? Momentary pain, what the hell does she know about it, she wasn't the one who got chopped? And her assuming that their girlfriends will be teen age whores, if they are so wordly wise that they've been able to view so many penises. Next off, my brother and I didn't sit around with our Dad comparing penises. Also notice all the I's she uses, I felt this, and I wanted, I wonder what the hell the husband thought? Was he some stupid little wuss, who just went along with her to keep the peace? I'd like to grab and shake some sense into her. Too bad that the boys have to pay for her stupid, ignorant attitude.
May 04, 2011 3:12 AM Amal
explained...
Thanks to the info from this page and others that I was able to share with my hubby, we did not circ our son who is now 3 days old :) Never even knew it was an option not to before finding this page, so thanks - we feel really good about our decision!
May 22, 2011 2:22 AM Anonymous
stated...
circumcision is very cultural...in Quebec you don't even get asked about it, if you want to get it done you have to find a doctor who does perform some (very rare) all on your own. It just doesn't seem like an option, why would it be? My son is intact just like every other man in my family!
June 14, 2011 1:36 PM