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Mr Yu: I let her take the initiative to study the secret, do parents have the see!


I was skillful apt speak about family education in this experience, because I did also many adjoin with kid. I educate at the campus from the beginning until later to do the fashionable East, and now go east from the new 700 million students. I've seen a lot of elated students, and too saw a lot of students was delayed; penetrate the success of many parents because the baby feel quite happy, also saw a lot of parents because the child's successful and you'd preferably die; I saw many needy families Finally, because the baby showing great agree and full of life, happiness; I discern a lot of billionaire families, parents and even the final issue because the child suffering from schizophrenia. Many parents and I said, Yu pedagogue, I put all the money donated to you, at all times you tin my child chance a customary, happy child. I often mention to them, now you say namely it namely also late, because the child is from birth to 18 years above the basic shape, all things have to be done before the old of 18.
Chinese have an old saying: 3-year-old to see a massive, 7-year-old look old. Chinese society is now a big transition period, from one agricultural society look into the business community. And now China's business ethics and business ethics itself without a complete understanding of the Chinese people in the business community in the swindling of the signs are everywhere. Many small businesses are caught in the medium of a panic, and in such a horror, how ought we teach our children? For example, we teach our children and sincere, but sincerely and then the children bullied along others outdoor; we school our children good, we base that good results are not acknowledged by the society of children. We will reflect on, is no to teach children the opportunistic thing, is not that teach children a little more provocative. Some of the things we do for adults, children sometimes unknowingly to show the wrong things, the child's own amounts, world outlook, a major impact on the formation of life. Therefore, we educate our children approximate a problem.
family training a altitude priority - schooling
Now the Chinese temperament as family education into a very complex era, there are community standards, the family there are standards and these standards also may be the erroneous criterion . For instance, our criterion is to necessitate children in the level into the top five, by the time the children acknowledged to Beijing University, Tsinghua even now successful, to Harvard, Yale is even more successful. Although this is standard, yet in my attitude, are wrong standard. Why the misdeed, because it eventually became the merely family standards. The child's growth there are many standards, such as whether the chaste character is a standard, if individual health is a standard, things have creativity, imagination is a standard, there is not spirit of bearing difficulties, there is a standard hard-working spirit, have the prowess to get up and fell to the ground and the spirit of a standard. China is now the society, the limited success of a particular narrow range, as the children test scores, agreeable grades is standard; a child five or six will play the piano, you will be rewarded. Our adult earth, China has not really a human has many friends as a standard of success, our adult world standard is that people are rich, classic and wealth.
I fell into such deep grief, many people said to me after seeing my first words: Some people think I am a medalist it? If I became a poor, must rely on their own exertion to make money people, would somebody come and tell me: friends, the real recognition of my success. I think he is a victor, not because I have a new East, I made money, but I have a man's basic guidelines, I always think I am a good person, I am a person they have no evil thoughts , small to large, I have not done a thing to hurt others. Of course, sometimes accidentally said something on the words to hurt others, then it is possible. Blurted out some words, other people will feel uncomfortable, I can beg to him, but the cursed things that I certainly have not done.
I think I succeeded the second point is that I am very compliant to help others. In truth, no matter what situation a person is to help others. I now can afford to contribute to the earthquake in Gansu, 300 million for construction of a new East Gannan Hope Primary School, I am very happy to help them. When we have nobody, you can help others. We all need to do things that they have to, but there is variant way, I can give a easy example. I grew up on the special labor of love, I do harvest work, chores, when I was 14 years old, you get the planting of our shire championship, 17 years old, I was good county tractor hand, my parents hard steer of my hard work. I am the person by far has been neither good nor bad, the teacher simply does not concern about me. But I want to heave to the consideration of teachers and students, so I have been since the first grade classroom wash health. To the North after I amplify a habit, every day cleaning houses, the cleaning would have done four years. Row of houses so we never had health duty manner. In addition, every day, carrying my water flask to the hostel to the students to fetch water, take it as an exercise. I accustom to hit everybody to see, finally there such a situation, sometimes I forget to fetch water, the students said: the disbursement of things, because we are all students, help each other for acknowledged. Some people say I am silly, I was inquired what good such a kick. I deem the benefits will be, you do a good action, it returns this year may emerge, there may be 10 years later. If you do a good deed, necessary return on the same day, then you must be a snob, but also a narrow-minded people. Do not anticipate everything in return, will return to. When you have a difficult time, people nigh you feel good, they can not reach out to help you? Of course, I fetch water and when I did not think they will have difficulties to help me. But 10 years later, in 1995, New Oriental has been done a definite size, I would like to find a associate, went to the United States and Canada to find those of my classmates. Then I came back specifically to lure them for a lot of greenbacks every day to spbring ... to an end the United States is very generous, let them know thatChina can make money, so I probably can get them back. Then they come back, but gave me a very unexpected causes. They said: We will not drink porridge.
From my experience I want to tell parents, if your child does not educate, out to stir up trouble, blame others when your child will say: New Oriental Foreign Language did not teach, aunts and uncles did not teach, people will say: Problem children grow up, parents must be planted roots. Child's success, and parents of the child's family is closely related to education is correct. We teach children is to teach character and ethics, whether the child's good character and moral education is the key to the success of child life. As long as he is respected figure, and his life will live particularly successful. Parents can think about, you want to do a fashionable person, or opposition a person to be everywhere? A lot of parents teaching children hardly all petty, education children to take advantage of, to teach children how to think of ways more than others, other people step on the foot, the end result is that children do not understand how to survive in this world. You give a child something, the child's future is what kind of person.
my daughter is now in the middle level of knowledge, but I never want to work as a daughter of the standard. I and my wife's educational philosophy opposed. My wife is the daughter into the top five will not get petulant, and I have just the opposite, my daughter the first 15 I am very happy every time I said to her daughter: There are 25 people, you more powerful! Actually able to drag the child away from a big life, is his personal action has a relationship with the character issue. The character set from the power of example, the child's parents as role models can not flee. We ask the children what no effect, because their parents failed to do. For example, the parents while playing mahjong while scold their children to learn, the children of course do not want to learn. When the father said: Why must I do to college? Parents are their children the best example. Set an example but I encountered many problems, my job is to use the computer, but I opened the computer, my daughter will think I am act other things. Although I tell my daughter is at work, but my daughter does not believe it. No way, at a time my daughter was learning, I took a paperback in my daughter to sit and see, this way, there is a sense in which the rules, role models play a very important role.
my parents I play a very important character. My parents are not educated,tods sneakers, but the advantages I have seen and heard parents who become my life criteria. I am in my father's example. My dad was a carpenter, is the frame beam, and he is an adept that a radius of 15 years. My dad was not a remuneration can be a happy person, because people have to rack your huge Ka beverage, I nectar a happy father had not money. Because the money behind to get it family, my mommy told me my father fight, my father looked mighty, my mother is very slender, the outcome every time my father knock my mother, my father never fight back. I learned from my father, no material what others say, he principally does not matter, at anyone time does not hurt my mother. My mother is particularly strong identity who sometimes say I hear to all kind of uncomfortable, but my father never has been the mouth. So, how I am training my wife and I either do not talk back, and I muse I should learn from his father. My father's charity into the body of an convenience. My mother brought me something more, there are two things I learned from childhood. First, industrious and gallant. The city's parents that their children home education is the maximum diligent and heroic center of things. A lot of people will say, even our children are too engaged to learn courses, how industrious and heroic ah? Housework I have done to assist him, how he industrious and brave ah? Although I am now very conducive conditions, but I still detect ways to help children who are industrious and courageous. I favor that, you do not work, then it starved to death, the rustic surroundings is condemned without my parents said I would do it.
my mother brought me to the second point, to advantageous. My mother is a special person who likes to help others, a child with two things impressed me the most. The first thing, once the next big rainstorm, I was eight or 9, this time the children most vulnerable to parental affect. At that time, every house basking in corn, my mother took my sister and I, my father, our family of four with all the neighbor's back to the rice until the rice to receive our home and found that rice has been poured rainy. At that time I do not understand, my mother gave me about two things, at the outset, people have a tough time you have to help people, not their home, and if we do not help their income, their home will be a year of food shower watery. Second, if the neighbors get onward well,tods mens, it is impossible in times of difficulties help each other. My mother told me with real operation, The second thing, poor crops a year, our family it is less than 20 pounds of edible, the mother half of the food to really divide the neighbors, I was very reluctant, and the mother said: less, you can use to eat rice mingled with vegetables, rice and no more than a neighbor who, regardless of their rice to the hungry people will be. They think we are good people. Now, my mother is the most adored people in our countryside.
do any one thing, you must think about it, I have not hurt others. For example, we adults sometimes like to say that backward the ill neighbors and colleagues, but that is not the time to dodge children. I told my wife appeared in such a situation, we consult the East West at home parents, the short, which were good character, which one character is not good, which were miserly, which were not stingy. The results once my daughter came back from school, the students told me her class which is good, which is not good students, which students stingy, which students snobbery. I told her that we can not say bad things about the students, the students every day with you, if you think their body's shortcomings, you in my heart, more importantly, you want students to learn the benefits. My daughter swiftly ask: Since then I told my wife set a rule, in front of children can not talk the shortcomings of others, they must tell each other good things.
cultivate children's love of life - mood education
As said above, is now home to do a top priority of education is to educate children with good character, and the second is to make education mood. My daughter was born more introverted, is a very calm child, my son is very junket, ascended up and down several times every day, my daughter do things slowly, my son is more peppery, which are inherently differ. In addition, the child's IQ is alter, I have not seen my daughter and son intelligence, what is the feud,tods sale, because their age difference is relatively small. We will see in this location, in a class, some children will always be premier or second, his comprehension is really tall. And no matter how hard our kids are in the middle, even the back. In such circumstances, how should parents do? Child is different, but by the time your child not to idiot level, at the peak of a normal child can enter their classrooms, will be able to make important event. Such as Hu's only two months on the school, but finally became the most mighty businessmen, but also adored longing, this is a good example.
I was vice premier of China Entrepreneurs Association, the Association has more than 1000 entrepreneurs, a graduate of Peking University Tsinghua University Fudan less than twenty, the repose are all seminary graduates, and even the planters, workers, university students, secondary school students, etc., but they have become successful entrepreneurs. Therefore, education can only be decided as portion of life, can not judge anything.
Our parents must have a skill, in any circumstance, both to move their children to progress, while nourishing the child's self-esteem from injure. First you must ensure that the child happy, have the last one also pleased, to give children a very good living in the world, to cultivate children's love of life, the parents of the most important tasks. American film Once he ran in front of the NYSE, a smiling person, that person is a stock broker, stock broker when he was very happy that, so he would work as a stockbroker. Later, he met a stock broker training of the people, the man began to look down on him, and later found him playing Rubik's cube very powerful,tods driving loafer, and this person happens to have the same liking, they were this person's cube skills profoundly fascinated, Both of them have become good friends. This man was given a accident to become America's most famous stock broker, to effect a billionaire's imagine.
This movie is based on true fable, the film's end, this man took half an hour about his own story. He inspired each of us, true happiness is not someone another, but their hard-fought. And now the parents of the children are very spoiled, what the child what to give. Such as children spotted a toy, the parents do not purchase he does not walk, and finally the parents can not only to buy. So the children have such a psychological, at a time he insists parents will be concessions. I buy things to his son before he will analyze what is rational, if the firm is not unreasonable to buy, if you can not be reasonably easy to buy him, I must let the child complete a mission just to buy him. For example, when my daughter to school in a exotic nation, the class of children each has a notebook microprocessor. Although my home desktop computers, laptop computers but would be more handy, and the family is not short of money, do not buy her is not right. I told her that my father will buy you, but you know, this world does not come in vain things, you are now a big chap, you need to disburse labor to get what you want. If she can narrate down 30 New Oriental English inspirational treatises on buying her. Results less than two weeks, she would narrate, and I bought her a laptop. This form of education so that children learn to disburse to get the fact, but also the way the child likes to do one more thing into her power.
fitting to encourage and inspire the unlimited latent - to encourage education
on how to encourage children, I tell a story. It had a renowned physicist, opening in junior high school physical, his physical performance is poor, had only eight points. Physics teacher had talked to him, let him take physics. Students learn that I do not like is bad, the teacher particularly intelligent, he told the student, other students are 60 minutes pass, at a time you test the next nine points to even pass. I just want to draw students to a check mark will be able to pass accessible, so I agreed, the next exam results with 28 points. Although 28 minutes, the teacher or no reason in front of the class in recognition of his, because or fail grade. The teacher is very natty, she let the whole class to the last test scores and the results do a subtraction, the last test 90, this is 90, a cut is 0, the last 95, the 93, a cutback is 2, so depressed to the last, remaining on a student 20 points, is this the students. Teachers to all students twice a poor test scores written on the blackboard and asked the question: points. This approach has not insult to encourage color, but also a great stimulus color. The students just get excited, he wanted to test whether my class 48,68,88 are the most cultivated, I have numerous advances in space. The teacher did a smart thing, the children would feel a extensive room for improvement, from the child in love with the physical, and eventually became one of the world's greatest physicist.
teacher education is very important, but parental education is more important, more accent on the parents because the child's words.
me give a simple example. If your child is the last class, how do you treat your children? The feedback of most parents and beat or curse meal. Children know they are wrong, but there is no way, he took the test 0 how do you do? You continue to hurt him in the end he could not learn. I suggest that parents and friends think about standing up long-term outlook, the first and the last one in the end there is many difference. Is not college kids spend their whole lives unpromising it? Absolutely not! Like I said, at the peak of the children's education is good, no matter what is of promise. I can cite their own examples. In the entry, I was not the first admitted, not admitted to the second year, third year was admitted. I spent three years and my classmates fight for a year, when I graduated at the university, our class 50 students, I was fifth last class, but the results did not hinder my career made his .
human growth is a lifetime thing, definitely not you in school, the University received a score decision. Scores for children is very important, but not because the child scores low on the faith that children unpromising. Your parents must be changed to resolve success. Children score high is the success of one of the criteria, but do not treat it as a standard is essential, but not as the only standard. Otherwise your children would be numerous injuries, because any time a test is only the first. If a class has 40 students, are in addition to the first, the rest of the 39 children are stupid it? Is failure? Absolutely not! So I have a expression of self-mockery: in fact, when the first is not easy, because he went so hard, Wang Qianmian a look, a catch-up people do not, go back a look, are chasing their own class, pursue of their own dead than alive, so there is no good when the first. When the last more than happy Yeah, look inward, are chasing a half-dead by their own people back and saw a man chasing his own did not, you want this life more chic it!
course, this view can not be said the child, you must learn how to encourage children. The countdown to the first test, next time I will encourage him to the penultimate test, the 20 points he quizzed, I would encourage him to test the next 30 minutes. Do not say your child, this exam, 60 minutes, you tell him next time do not think 90 minutes to enter the house. You say, some children will of course hard to learn, but some children can not reach 90 points like crazy, then how can he do? What really would not let him enter the house? Are you sure let him enter the house, you let him enter the house means that you talk does not count, since the children will know, my parents are talking not count, then I do not care, he would not let me anyway enter the house, so parents are a child stabbed.
so parents must remember apparently, you must not let the children live and eat, what to absolutely not what you want. Educate their children and domesticated animals are accurate the same, many parents do not like the zoo's beast trainer. Tame animals, beast trainer, there are two ways, first, to encourage, perfect encouragement; second, finite, or even punishment. I once asked a domesticated animal trainer of dolphins, why did he education of dolphins leaping from the water, and the surround from drilling in the elapse so high? He said that in fact is not going to do dolphins began his first on the water inside this circle, who has been training dolphins drilling in the elapse give it a fish, no not to eat the last drill. Dolphins are not stupid, the fish soon learned the usage, and later formed a kind of dolphin on the conditioned reflex. Of course, animals certainly not so clever as we, like, case in point, I tell you, this circle you are drilling in the past, I let you on the North, you are sure to drill later, because you know this thing in your like. Dolphins will not know the relationship among amuse, but understand the principle of dolphins, at all times I drilled this ring I had fish, no drilling in the past will go peckish. Animal trainer immediately put half of the circle made the water so the dolphins continue to drill. Dolphin ring is not found in the water, and can only jump in the past. Gradually, the circle is increasing, probably put 10-20 times a year all but, the exercise of dolphins jumping circle is complete. We have not noticed, when looking at the dolphin show, all from the circle jump over dolphins will swim to the side members to be domesticated fish, because it knows that each jump can eat something.
dolphins from the example on, parents should understand the rule of encouraging the children and limit the process of education is very important. For example, children had 0 points, you should encourage children to test the afterward 10 minutes, the child I thought, to test 10 points was quite effortless, you can increase some conditions. For example, the kids love to eat McDonald's, you can use it as a temptation, coincided to test 10 children, took him to dine McDonald's, and then little by little with the child's scores go. For example, your child took the test 60 minutes, you do not say afterward period you want to test to 90 minutes, or the children gave it. You ambition the children said that 60 minutes has been beautiful good, next period you can not take 70 minutes, I do not put your waiter in the students than I look at your progress today than yesterday, tomorrow than today, you progress, this describing a child's scores will go up. Him up every point you have to encourage him. When test scores were lower, you should acquaint the child, this may be the casual mistake, parents support you, do not impair the passion of a child to learn.
to encourage the same time, parents must set rules to the children. My son like to eat ice cream, my wife let him eat a lot every day, to eat bad teeth. I do not go on this access, it requires him to eat an ice lotion one day only, and must be finished behind half an hour to eat dinner. My 4 year old son had equitable do not understand what a half-hour conception. I told him, that long walk where the needle is half an hour. I look at the clock while his son, a half-hour saw more than 100 times. Finally coming to a half hour, and can not wait to eat the ice emulsion. The next day, it becomes to see a dozen times, and to become the third day to see two or three times, and to the fourth day he knew that anyway, temporary fad can not eat, play went on, until he memorized to eat when the half-hour has passed. As long as the right thing, parents should encourage their children, and to give the children set the rules. After the created rules, parents must not be arbitrarily changed, the change will be a problem.
Finally, I want to talk about the parents will commit another wrong, shrieked to syndrome. Parents particularly want her to become a small talent, in fact, this is a parent's vanity at play. Chinese parents would be guilty of two problems, first, all their children will not make things, want their children to get completions in a field. So many parents coerce their children to this school from basic school that has no meaning. Child's most important is to let him grow up slowly. My daughter likes to play the piano from the age of five, began playing, playing piano on the savor, and was admitted to a level, every week classes, sit for an hour each time could not shake, the results of my daughter kill all interest in playing the piano out. My daughter did not want to learn, but my wife forced her to learn. I asked my wife, your children over the age of 10 when a piano ten, 10 years later she still does not learn to play the piano learn? If she does not learn after the age of 10, then 1-year-old from her piano lessons to 10-year-old what's the use? If you do not want children to develop into a great pianist, then you let the children 10 years of age by ten tests is not justified. Second, you let the children so school, she lost interest in the piano, she did not love playing the piano. My daughter said, Dad does not coerce you to learn, do not let you Grading. Dad regret this life thing is not to play dulcet instruments, musical instruments can determine depressed. Piano Grading principle is to allow you, but to help you find a aisle to express feelings. The future you will enter the social circle, if you can sing at a friend when the piano accompaniment, so you will get the respect of others. If you do not want to learn, can not maintain your new level. My daughter is very like the piano, the work done weary, playing the piano for half an hour. After that she told a teacher once each week, learning the piano pile up condensed the interest.
In synopsis, family education, character education is most important, followed by sensibilities of Education, and the third is to encourage education. Finally, the parents let the child learn to persevere hardship.
Finally, I want to tell parents and friends, you take everything, your life, wealth, status,tods for men, all to the child, your child will not necessarily life-long happiness. You only teach children how to be a successful person, teach your child learn to pursue their own goals, learn to enjoy to achieve goals further happiness and satisfaction, your child will acquire true happiness.